1st Monday 2/8/2016

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Happy Lunar New Year!

It’s time for me to blog again and update! YEY!

I’ve been pretty busy with life. I don’t have any other excuses except for my lack of time to really give much thought to writing and thinking about what to blog about. I have been busy with work, planning for my wedding, my family, my mobile games, my Wattpad stories, and my recent loss in the team lead post — that I have totally neglected writing for my blog. I’m really sorry about that. I can make tons of excuses why I wasn’t able to write anything but I don’t want to start my Lunar New Year with an excuse.

I have been reviewing my old blogs and my old blog entries and I noticed that I used to rant too much. I wasn’t able to blog in October, November and December last year because I really have a bad Mañana Habit. I have photos of places I’ve been too which was stocked on my mobile phone for months. I have experiences that I chose to not blog about to prevent from ranting. The reason why I’m stopping myself is basically to avoid making my blog a dumpsite of negative energy, nightmares and bad memories. ‘Though, I would consider failing several times miserably on the Team Leader post a huge reason for most of my depressive moods last year, I still couldn’t stop myself from letting it all out. Where else would I air it, if not here, right?

I also taught myself to blog moderately and “responsibly” last year. The reason why I wasn’t able to post entries often was because I didn’t want to force my thoughts and ideas to write about something or just anything if I don’t want to or if I literally can’t. I opted not to blame my muse or my writer’s block into becoming unproductive last year. Simply because I don’t want to write for the sake of writing. I also would like to let my mind wander and breathe.

I sometimes feel that I’m forcing myself to write an update for my Wattpad stories and the usual results are not that satisfactory for me. I tend to revise the story at hand and change details on the spot. I prefer to write spontaneously because I can just let my subconscious dictate how I feel about a certain situation. It feels better and more therapeutic than just forcing things to happen through writing anything that I can think of at the moment. A smooth sailing idea is better than a forced one.

I used to have daily blog entries which I usually start with the ordinal number followed by the day of the week on the title. It started some years ago, when I was still very active on Tumblr and when my audience were still the rad teens and young adults of the generation. However, in the middle of the year, I got so busy with other personal things that I eventually lost count on the frequency of my blogging habits until I finally gave up on what ordinal number it was and what day it should be written. In short, I procrastinated a lot to the extent of neglecting this unique writing style of mine.

In line with the title, is my daily reflection and a daily diary of how my day transpired. I guess, I had ample time to write at that time because it wasn’t as hectic as these days. I can say that I can’t totally commit to the daily blog postings but I will try my best. I also would like to practice my English by writing and also to de-stress. However, I should also make it a habit to just write whenever I feel the need to and whenever I want to and not because I have to keep up with the others.

Hey, I’ve tried The Sunday Currently last year as well and then I got so preoccupied with my overtime work, then life happened and I just stopped doing it. Talk about procrastinating. :))

From my attitude towards blogging, I have also succumbed to the wonders of make up and the artsy girly side of me.

I envy YouTubers who have the guts to show their face and make a video and Vlog. I have started an audio recording on one of my entries and I am planning to do it again next time. When? I still don’t know. All I know is, I feel much better in writing my thoughts here than just reading it and speaking it. I still watch Vlogs, make up tutorials, make up hauls and other stuff that they do online but all I can do for now is just watch and subscribe. I would love to start my own channel. Hahahaha! If I only have the same confidence and knowledge in putting on some make up or having a review of the products that I bought.

I had also started buying my own make up and had started some minor hauls last year. I started buying make up products because I got really encouraged by the videos that I have watched. I also can’t get enough of the idea that at 27, I was able to have my own version of a make up kit. Hahahaha! 🙂

I used to believe that since I’m allergic to loose powder, I won’t be able to put on any make up on my face forever and that I will just have to resort to a beauty parlor’s hair and make up service to make me look presentable on huge occasions. Lo and behold, I just found myself buying my own cheap curling iron, own make up brushes, BB cream, blotting paper, two way cake powder, lip gloss, matte lipstick, lip balm, blush and contouring cream / powder, and make up bag, a few months before the year ends. Ino also has to restrain me when we go to SM Department Store and Watsons because those places became a haven for me even if I’m just a beginner in make up stuff. I used to hate going to that place because it was too girly and kikay for me. I guess, I’m just a late bloomer and I just started appreciating it because of my sister’s advice as well.

As for my plans, goals and resolutions for this year, here are the things that I’m still struggling on but I’m willing to do, explore, make a research on and try for the rest of the year:

  1. Diet and exercise. Ugh! Going to the gym? No other motivation than having a slimmer figure for the gown and the wedding.
  2. Underarm whitening and hair removal. To complete all the sessions for a tiis ganda experience. Oh, Diode Laser is not painful.
  3. Teeth whitening. I’ve always wanted to bleach my teeth but I think it’s quite expensive. I’m still considering this.
  4. Go to an optical shop or consult an ophthalmologist. If I would have a surgery, I’d want to have a LASIK operation. I want to do things better without wearing eye glasses, to swim on the beach or pool without worrying about my eye glasses and just enjoying the place. This is a long term goal.
  5. Read more. Reading more books and finishing the series or novels that I have started before reading a new one or buying a new one. This would be an everyday goal. I should read before I go to bed and be more passionate on expounding my vocabulary.
  6. Write or blog more. I want to write meaningful posts about my thoughts, experiences, observations, first impressions, reviews and some rants. I’d love to discover more interesting books, movies, restaurants, food and other places to make my own reviews about. I’d also like to write about mainstream stuff even if I am not into mainstream most of the time. I just want to keep track with what will be “in” for this year or what major things will happen. Cross fingers on this one because it’s not my thing and this is just an out of the box idea.
  7. An unboxing experience. I’d love to have my first unboxing! Hahaha! Maybe it will open doors for me to make a make up review or a first impression! Hahahaha! 🙂
  8. Watch and read more reviews about beauty products. More reviews, more products to haul, more interesting things to discover. 🙂 More money to spend.
  9. Get more sleep. Of all the things that I want, this is one of the items on the list that I am struggling on. Sleep is essential but it is also the only time where I can write freely. Hmmmmmm… How?
  10. Money wise. I’m not a thrifty person. I’m a one day billionaire. I can spend a P1000 in less than an hour. I need to change this habit now. I need to save money for my wedding. Pay bills on time. Be more reasonable and more responsible with my duties.
  11. Laundry. I need to be more efficient in doing the household chores. I need to do my laundry ASAP so that it won’t pile up. Less procrastination, less excuses, more effort.
  12. Decide on my career the whole year so that I can have a better career plan next year. I need to find a way to become passionate in my job again. Sadly, being turned down several times doesn’t boost my self esteem. I need to find another way to be more caring and in love with my job. Actually, what makes me apathetic to work in my current field is my choice and decision to be indifferent and less concerned about the people I work with and the sincerity to do the job full-heartedly.  I’m wasting my time in this field because it is stable in a way that it makes me earn monthly. I still value the time that I allotted in the company and the students that I have been teaching for years and months. I can say that I’m still being professional about it but I’m not 99.9% willing to stay in the company anymore. These are my bruised ego and self esteem talking.
  13. Take more photographs. I don’t need a DSLR or a new camera for more photos to blog about. I just need to be more confident in taking photos of what I want to share to the world or for me to remember.

That’s it for now. It’s already 4:47 AM and I need to hit the sack! Thanks for taking the time to read! 🙂

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